Fears and Favors
by King in Yellow
Summary: If a large birthday party for four year old twins wouldn't send the average parent screaming in terror there is the threat of a long promised gift. Title shamelessly swiped from my friend A Markov. Best Enemies series.
1. Chapter 1  Fears and Favors

Boilerplate Disclaimer: Disney owns all the characters from the Kim Possible series. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. 

My profile page has an overview of the Best Enemies universe.

NoDrogs created Kasy Ann and Sheki Go Possible in his story A Small Possibility. I changed their origin completely.

Title is stolen from A Markov. Thanks for giving good title.

**Fears and Favors**

Bonnie arrived 'home' a week before the twin's fourth birthday party. She kept them up until after midnight, and they all fell asleep on her bed. The twins were too tired and cranky for preschool the next day, so Bonnie took them shopping for clothes and their birthday gifts after a nap.

Kim issued fairly brief directions before she let the girls go shopping with Bonnie, "No makeup and no pierced ears."

Shego's directions were slightly broader, "No body piercings of any kind -- and no tattoos."

After shopping Bonnie stopped at the Post Office to collect held mail and spent most of the evening sorting it.

Everyone else was already in the kitchen when she came downstairs the next morning.

"God, you're becoming a sloth," Shego told Bonnie after the twins greeted her. "You must have slept in until what? Seven in the morning?"

"I was up late going through the mail," Bonnie yawned. She gave Ron a kiss on the cheek, "What's for breakfast?"

"Anything you want."

"You know," Kim mentioned to Shego, "I don't think Ron has ever said that to us when we asked what's for breakfast."

The actress stuck her tongue out at the two of them, "You've never had Valentine's Day plans with him like mine."

"Valentine's Day?"

"Hello? Just before the twin's birthday, remember?"

"Of course we remember. It's our third anniversary. Ron did you forget you were going to babysit?"

"Oh, darn. Look, K and S, can I get out of that? Bonnie has plans, with a capital P."

"You wouldn't hold him to that, would you?" Bonnie pleaded.

Shego sighed, "I guess not. We can find another babysitter."

"Thanks," Bonnie giggled and gave Shego a kiss on the cheek. "Don't wait up for us that night."

After breakfast Kim and Shego discussed child care as they got dressed. "I'm making the plans for dinner," Shego complained. "Can you find it in your copious free time to find a babysitter?"

"No way, I'm--"

"too busy saving the world," the pale woman finished for her. "Look, Princess, I'm busy too. I'm trying to learn all the stuff at the office they didn't teach me in law school, plus starting to study for the bar exam--"

"Okay, okay. You're busy too. There's got to be somebody."

"Any high school kids in your church who can stay up late or sleep over if necessary?"

"Not this close to V-Day. The good ones have all been booked and I wouldn't want the others. Zita?"

"She'd do it. She feels like she owes us. But I really don't want to take advantage of her. Besides, she may be busy -- I haven't talked with her in a couple weeks. How about your folks?"

"I know they have plans. I wished we'd known earlier. I'll bet your mom would have flown in and stayed for the birthday party. A shame Joss went away to college and took Bego with her."

"Hey, Wade said he was going to try and visit her on Valentine's Day."

Kim paused before asking, "Should I be happy?"

"Give him some slack. You've been around enough geniuses you know they can get quirky. Speaking of geniuses, do the boys in the garage have dates?"

"I don't know if they have dates, but I don't want them to babysit. Not after they nearly got lost in the basement with the girls last time."

"Tara? If they're going out we could take the girls over and pay their babysitter -- or have Jason and Jessica for a sleepover here."

"No, Tara's leaving the kids with her folks."

"You're not giving me any help here, Cupcake. It looks like we're down to Helen and Drakken."

"No! I won't have a dead woman or a blue man watching my babies."

"They're not exactly babies anymore."

"They're always going to be my babies." Kim sighed, "I'll ask if Jim or Tim can do it. They owe me for all the times I had to babysit them… Maybe we can lock the door to the basement?"

"Oh, real smart. That just dares them to go down. Maybe we could chain the door open?"

"You're convinced the time-space anomaly only happens when the door is opened? I'm not sure about that. What happens if it can kick in anytime and the door is open?"

"A year and a half and it's only happened when the door--"

"And we've only noticed it when we opened the door."

"Look, you've said you'd ask if one of them could do it. They're probably scared enough after the last time they'll behave."

"Okay, I'll ask my brothers. It's probably safer if we just get one. The girls will keep one too busy to cause problems. But I'm going to be too busy worrying to have fun while we're out."

Shego backed Kim against the wall and went gently to work on the redhead's neck and throat, murmuring between kisses and lovebites, "Then I'll just have to work extra hard to distract you on our anniversary."

Looking flushed Kim finally pushed her away, "Sounds great, but we'd better stop now or I'll be late for saving the world and you'll be late for the office."

Shego looked a little disappointed, "Some days I think I need to steal something to get your attention."

Kim laughed, "Save it for our anniversary. Oh, but I'm willing to give a couple loud moans now to make Bonnie think we're having a quickie before we leave."

"With the girls in their room?"

"Now who's being a stick-in-the-mud?"

Shego left the bedroom calling, "Girls, give mommy and Bonnie a kiss, time to go."

When Shego got home with the girls after work Bonnie was out in the driveway in a tattered old Middleton U sweatshirt throwing a football back and forth with Ron. They moved to one side and she parked in the garage and sent the girls out to harass Ron and Bonnie while she went to the apartments above the garage to see if Jim or Tim was in and had agreed to sit.

Ron threw her a pass as she left the garage and laughed when some mud splattered her face.

"Careful, Stoppable, I just had this suit dry cleaned. Hey, Rockwaller, keeping up the glamorous Hollywood image?"

"That's what's so nice about being home. I can dress like the rest of you riff-raff and don't have to worry about my picture showing up in some scandal sheet."

"So you're really going to keep renting the room?"

"Absolutely. Like I said, this is home."

The pale woman stopped between the two of them on the way to the house, "Oh, since we gave up Ron without a fight for our anniversary, I want to make sure you're planning to help chaperon the party."

"Exactly how big a fourth birthday party are you planning?"

"It, uh, got a little out of hand," Shego confessed. "I go to a small synagogue, three kids their age are invited--"

"That's nothing."

"I know. Eight kids from their Sunday School class at Kim's church..."

Bonnie looked slightly nervous.

"And ten kids from preschool."

"Don't forget Jason and Jessica," Ron reminded her.

Bonnie did some fast math, "Twenty-three kids?"

"Twenty-five with the twins."

"No way! I'm heading back to LA."

"You wouldn't do that to us," Ron said.

"Come on, Tara will be here, and Kim's mom and dad," Shego told her. "A couple Methodist moms may stay. Felix and Justine will be over, and we're ordering pizza and playing poker that night."

"Oh, yeah, if we have any strength left after the party. Here are my non-negotiables, I want a back-rub that night and breakfast in bed the next morning."

"I think Kim and I can do that for you."

"Not you," Bonnie laughed. "Him," she pointed to Ron.

"What do you say, Stoppable? Think you could force yourself to get your hands on one of the hot new stars of daytime television?"

"I suppose… If I have to."

"Why, you--" Bonnie bent over and dipped both hands in the cold mud. Ron knew what was happening and took off running, with Bonnie in hot pursuit. The twins laughed as the pair rounded the corner of the house.

"Ah, young love," Shego sighed. "Into the house, girls. Nothing to see out here. And if there is, you aren't allowed to watch."

Ron and Bonnie took showers and changed clothes before dinner that evening. The meal was winding down when the phone rang. "Ignore it," Shego suggested.

"Can't, they may need me to--"

"Save the world," Ron, Bonnie, and Shego all said together.

"I wonder who saved the world before Kim," Bonnie asked.

"I think she has a Messiah complex," Shego added as Kim picked up the phone and said hello.

Shego was in a position to watch Kim's face and body language as the redhead spoke on the phone. She noticed as Kim paled and leaned against the counter for support. "Yes," the redhead spoke into the phone. "That's right, this Saturday. … The kids should be gone by four. … Four-thirty? You really don't have to, you know. … No, that's fine. See you around four-thirty." The Global Justice agent was trembling as she sat down at the table.

"What's wrong, Princess?"

Kim addressed her daughters, "Do you remember Holly who came to visit last spring?"

"Holly… Is she the funny lady Eemah brought home?"

Shego's eyes went wide at the memory, and Ron paled also.

"Yes," Kim told the girls, "she promised to stop by after the party with a present for you."

The girls let out little shrieks of joy and Kim asked them to go watch TV or go to their room for a minute and let the grownups talk.

Shego stared, wide-eyed, at Kim. "I forgot all about her. I hoped she had forgotten all about us."

"Who?" Bonnie demanded.

"No such luck," Kim told Shego. "She's been working on their gift."

"Who," Bonnie repeated, raising her voice slightly.

"God, no!" Ron moaned. "I don't even know what it is and I'm not ready for it."

Bonnie leaned over and grabbed Kim by the shoulders, turning the redhead to her and shaking her slightly, "Who is Holly?"

"Amy Hall," Ron said in a hollow voice.

"AKA DNAmy," Shego added. "I helped her out last spring. World-famous geneticist with a serious lack of ethical standards."

"Is she the one who," Bonnie paused trying to think of a verb that worked. She rejected 'help' as not exactly accurate and finally just continued the sentence without a verb, "… with the twins?"

"That's her," Kim confirmed, "Shego called her their fairy godmother."

"I know she was trying to hurt you, but what's the problem with her coming now?"

"She promised to make a pet for the girls."

Bonnie paused, the only work she'd seen from Amy was the twins. "I still don't see the problem."

"The woman makes monsters," Ron told her.

"You could regift?" Bonnie suggested.

"Don't think so," Shego sighed. "I doubt any shelter in Middleton would take it. And I'll bet money the girls fall in love with whatever it is."

"So that means…?"

"We're all doomed," Kim said.

---

Author's Note: This chapter refers back to the story "An Equinox Carol."


	2. Chapter 2 Let Sleeping Dragons Lie

Disclaimer: Disney owns everything about Kim Possible. 

Karl Marx inspired the opening line.

**Let Sleeping Dragons Lie…**

A spectre is haunting Possible Manor -- the spectre of DNAmy. Even Helen, who normally haunted the place, felt the tension, which seemed limited to the adults -- the twins seemed happier than usual. She found the girls putting a pillow and an old blanket into a box by the bunkbed. She cocked her head slightly and raised an eyebrow.

"We're going to get a pet!" Kasy told her.

Helen had liked her dog. She held out her hands, fairly close together, and slowly moved them apart.

Sheki looked at Kasy, who shook her head. "We don't know how big," Sheki told the white lady. "Why aren't you talking?"

"Because almost no one can hear me. Many people can't even see me."

"What did she say?" Kasy demanded.

"You're very special," Helen told her, stretching out her hand to Sheki's head. The little girl was never certain if she really felt the white lady's touch or only imagined Helen patting her hair.

Shego worked hard on their anniversary to keep Kim's mind off the party. After dinner and dancing they came home to find Tim asleep on the couch, television still on. Shego turned off the set while Kim put a blanket over her brother, "Let him sleep here," she whispered to her partner before they headed upstairs.

Bonnie's door was open as they went by and Kim couldn't resist peeking in. "She's not there. Are they still out or should we check Ron's room?"

Shego shook her head in disgust, "You aren't supposed to be thinking of anyone but me."

"Really?"

"Really." She moved in and kissed Kim deeply, her fingers finding the zipper on the little black dress with a skill born of practice and unzipping it while her lips and tongue kept the redhead distracted. She moved her body slightly away from Kim's and the dress fell to the floor. "If you don't want the girls to catch us making out in the hall you'll come to the bedroom now."

Shego proved amazingly effective in helping Kim forget about DNAmy. Indeed, by the time the redhead fell asleep in her lover's arms an hour later she not only would not have remembered DNAmy's name but she would not have remembered the month, what state she lived in, or even her own name. Kim was purring in her sleep as Shego pulled a blanket over them and adjusted her body temperature to keep them both warm. "Happy anniversary, Princess," she murmured before she too drifted off.

It was impossible to sleep late on the day that four-year olds were having a birthday party. The twins were in bouncing on their bed at 6:30. "Go away," Kim ordered and pulled a pillow over her head.

The order didn't faze them. "Time to get up Eemah!" Kasy urged.

"Five bucks to each of you if you let me have another half hour of sleep."

"Uncle Ron is making breakfast!" Sheki told her.

"Ron was up this early?"

"We woke him up first--"

"No, second, uncle Tim was first."

Shego groaned, "Okay girls, we're moving." She nudged Kim, "Time to get up."

"Five more minutes, please."

"No."

"You're mean."

Shego addressed the girls, "You'd better leave. I think mommy forget to get into her pajamas when she went to bed last night. And I'm going to pull the blanket off her in thirty seconds.

Kim grabbed the blanket and held on tight, "You wouldn't," knowing full well that Shego would.

"Nineteen… Eighteen… Seventeen…" The twins ran from the room, clattering down the stairs towards the kitchen.

"Good, they're gone. Give me fifteen more minutes to sleep."

"Three… Two… One…"

Everyone in the kitchen heard Kim's shriek. Jim might have heard it out in the garage.

Kim stumbled into the kitchen behind Shego, and went straight for her drug of choice. After pouring herself a cup she put in a packet of Splenda and took a hit. While they waited for the coffee to bring Kim back to life Ron, Bonnie, and Shego laid out the schedule for party preparations.

"Are you and Jim coming up to help?" Shego asked.

"No way, we'll be at the U or out at Lipsky and Load."

"Remember, your folks will be here. They may check out your apartment. Better throw out the pizza boxes and hide any porn."

"Do they still print porn? I think that's why they invented the internet."

Part way down her second cup of coffee Kim became fully functional and joined in getting the house ready. Kim's parents were over early to help, and Tara also arrived early with Jessica and Jason. By the time the blonde arrived the house was ready and the twins took her two children off to see the pet bed.

Tara took a thick envelope out of her purse, "I had prints made for you of some of the Halloween pictures."

"Show them to Bonnie, she hasn't seen them."

Bonnie gave an appropriate squeal, "They are so cute!"

"I know; my Jessica is the perfect Bubbles. And Kasy was wonderful as Blossom, and Sheki as Buttercup."

"Is that Jason?"

"Yes, Ron made the Mojo Jojo mask."

Bonnie smiled, "He's got many talents," then noticed Kim in the background on one of the pictures. "And what were you dressed as?" she asked the redhead.

"I was dressed like a mother going around with her daughters. Shego gets the job next year."

"Switching off every year until they're old enough to go by themselves?"

"No, Shego can't be trusted. She got into costume to give out candy here. Nearly caused a riot. Didn't I tell you?"

"Not that I can remember."

"You'd have remembered. Shego dressed up as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark--"

"Isn't she the one with the really low-cut--"

"Oh yeah, that's her. We ran out of candy big time. When I got home there must have been two hundred guys in the yard. The police finally had to shoo the crowd away."

"And I caught a chest cold," Shego added.

"No sympathy. You brought the cold front on yourself."

The party began with lunch and Kim's dad was put in charge of grilling burgers and hot dogs as the children started to arrive.

The planned games after lunch worked well, with the twins proving amazingly adept at a game where every player had a balloon tied to one leg while trying to break other players' balloons. All the adults were tired of blowing up balloons by the time they exhausted the supply of balloons after three rounds.

Some of the activities were less structured. While few kids had seen a real banister before they instinctively knew what to do with the grand staircase whenever an adult wasn't looking. Justine caught Jason with three other boys opening and closing the basement door, hoping it would open someplace interesting. She stopped them before they could go down into what looked like the Serengeti. She closed the door quickly when she heard what might have been a lion's roar in the distance and stationed a puzzled Methodist mom in the kitchen who wondered why she was to keep kids away from the basement door. Shego confiscated a roll of Mentos and wondered how to take strawberry soda stains off the ceiling. And Kim contained the fire damage to the living room couch. She hoped the device had accidentally fallen from Tim's pocket, because if he left there on purpose…

Ron got into costume to provide entertainment before cake and ice cream. "Knock-em dead," Bonnie said, giving him a kiss for encouragement. "I've always thought your humor was perfect for four year olds."

"You're just jealous that I'm the entertainment and you're not."

"No, I'm just happy you're wearing suspenders so your pants can't fall down," she said, pulling a suspender and letting it snap back on him.

"I'll take them off after the party, if you want."

Then cake, ice cream, and a fight over which twin got to sit by Jason. "I told you he's trouble," Kim hissed at Shego.

"They're too young to be fighting over a boy," Shego whispered back.

By 3:45 the house was cleared of children, except the twins and Tara's pair as she offered to help with cleanup. They left a half hour later, Jason complaining he wanted to see the new pet.

"I'm getting too old for this," James Possible complained as he swept up wrapping paper.

"At least it's not at our place," his wife reminded him.

At 4:27 the doorbell rang. "I'll get it," Shego offered.

A minute later she led in the stout geneticist, who was carrying two boxes, while the twins jumped around her like excited puppies.

"Not so loud," 'Holly' warned them, "he's probably asleep."

Kim felt some relief that the box with air holes was fairly small. Everyone gathered around the kitchen table as the geneticist carefully sat down her burden. Kim's parents stood to the side, not sure how to react to the woman who had helped make them grandparents. There was a collective gasp as Amy unfolded the towel from a small, curled up form.

"It's beautiful, look at the colors."

"It can't be real."

"Is he real?" Kasy demanded.

"Yes, dear," 'Holly' assured her.

To underline the point two black eyes opened, a tiny mouth yawned, and someone stretched out to his entire glorious eleven inches, half of which was tail.

"Can I hold him?" Sheki whispered.

Shego wasn't sure it was a good idea, but Amy handed the creature over. "Be careful, he's just a baby."

"Can we show him our room?"

"Go ahead," Amy said cheerfully. The worried grandparents left with the twins.

"You told me once that your portmanteau creatures didn't live very long," Kim reminded Amy.

"That's when I combine adults. This was embryology and gene splicing. I don't know how long it might live."

Shego interrupted. "What does it eat?"

"You had some good luck there, it should eat about anything: insects, mice, fruit and vegetables. There is no ruminant in him, though. He won't eat grass."

"Can it fly?" Ron wanted to know.

"I doubt it, I just thought the bat wings would look nice. It's hard to say though. He is just a baby. The skeletal system appears light, however, so he might learn."

Shego came back with another practical question, "How big will he get?" In his present size a large terrarium sounded ideal.

"Well, I really can't tell about that either. Most of the parts are from creatures that stay small."

"Most?" Kim echoed

"Yes, but who knows what will dominate. There's never been anything like him."

_"Except in nightmares,"_ Kim thought. "Anything else?"

Amy hesitated, and handed over the second box. Shego opened the top, exposing dozens of vials with green, yellow, and red stoppers.

"What is it?" Shego asked.

"Antidote."

"Antidote?"

"The beaded lizards that gave some of the coloring were poisonous--"

"The twins--"

"Are perfectly safe. I took DNA samples when I was here. He won't want to bite them, and the poison wouldn't affect them. For anyone else… Let him get to know you. You can take the dose in a green vial orally for up to six hours after a bite -- or as long as you can swallow. The yellow vial requires an injection if the person can't swallow any more. If the pupils are no longer dilating inject the red, call the hospital and hope for the best."

Amy's news was still sinking in when James Possible called from the top of the stairs, "Kimmie-cub? Where are the bandaids?"

"Why dad?"

"I tickled the little fellow and he nipped me."

---The End---


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